i want someone to pull me to the side. and talk me through what i am doing. but i've got no one i can talk to about this.
he is 'banned' from seeing me. so he does it in secret.
when im away from him i hate myself. but when im with him i dont feel like anything is wrong.
i find myself analysing everything he sayss to me to try and suss it out. why does he want to see me?
i feel so stupid. i am so confused. nothing works out right for me! ever!
when im not with him, like now, i have so many things i want to say to him and ask him, then when im there i just forget and nothing matters.